Balancing the People

Senior Counsel and the honorary MP for Bishan-Toa Payoh GRC (etc. etc.) Mr Hri Kumar has been crossing swords with Asst Prof Eugene Tan of SMU over the issue of the need to hold a by-election at the Hougang single member constituency (SMC). Prof Tan argued that the government is obliged to hold one. Mr Hri Kumar said no. That's what Mr Kumar's legalese amounted to anyway. You know what? I may be able to follow the argument, but I am no more enlightened by it all, especially Mr Kumar's arguments, which seem to fit chambers, but are lost with us common folks.

But one thing I can discern, and that is the PAP, which Mr Hri Kumar so likes to point out that he is beholden to for his present position in Parliament, has still not learned from last year's elections. Well, let's set aside all the intellectual crossing of swords and ask ourselves: if I were a resident, if Mr Kumar is a resident, of Hougang, would he much prefer to have an MP represent him? Honestly? A 'yes' or a 'no' will do. I would say 'yes'. If nothing, having an MP working for you is an entitlement as a citizen. I don't pay more nor less for an MP's allowance, so why deprive me? But above all considerations of money, can I trust the PAP government to look after me? Not if it pussyfoots on holding a by-election, as it appears to be doing now.

So my question is, does the PAP government even have a heart for the people? Right now, the answer, going by Mr Hri Kumar's eloquence on the national stage and in the newspapers, is NO. Its the law, you see. Its about "may" and "should" or "could" or whatever, that is important. He admires and trusts the law, whether it is British Law or Singapore Law, to cover the PAP's collective behind. And all said in learned sentences that probably three-quarters of Singaporeans don't understand. I daresay that if Mr Kumar comes out to contest in an SMC tomorrow (why not Hougang"), he will have his figurative tail between his legs when the votes are tallied. Maybe that's the REAL reason for prevaricating? (see I also know some cheem words, don't play play).

So we have another PAP man who rides a high horse and seems to be having a good time talking it up. The people, nahhh, they are not important. Where are the people in Mr Kumar's learned opinions? Sadly, they don't exist. The PAP might as well drop the first 'P' in its name.

If the PAP is listening, the problem with you is your arrogance. Period.

P.S. I fear that I will be accused of putting words into someone's mouth. I apologise if I have offended anyone, or deigned (there's another cheem word) to criticize duly elected and learned members of national institutions.

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Guest Appearance on Singapore Talking: How do we preserve our Hawker Heritage?

In this episode of Singapore Talking, we discuss the topic of how we are going to preserve our Singapore Hawker Culture in the midst of modernization.  Of all the points which we discussed, I think the most interesting and practical point is that we should include Singapore heritage food recipes into our school curriculum.  Why are we teaching our kids how to make muffins in home economics class and not Ang Ku Kueh?  Why are they taught to make a French Omelette instead of Oyster Omelette in our culinary schools?  We really do need to include Singapore Hawker Cuisine as a module when we train our next generation of chefs! 

Here is Part II, Part III, Part IV.

Thanks to Sen for the upload.

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VIDEO OF THE WEEK

Guys may love it but truth be told, no one can drink beer like a woman can. See for yourself. Have a good week ahead!

Missus Singapore out!

Missus Singapore or Miss Us Singapore (at your own peril) - A married woman on the loose

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THE WRONG IMPACT

Well finally, after years of stating that affairs by women are on the rise, there is some acknowledgement. Apparently, family lawyers are reporting rising affairs by women are the cause of many divorces here.

The figures are staggering. Almost as many women are having affairs as their male counterparts. Some put it down to the rising status of women in the home and workplace who seem to think that they are 'entitled' to this.

I mean I am all for women chasing their dreams, carving out a successful career and taking measures to improve their self-confidence but this is one area that they really don't need to step into.

Of course many blame their husbands for not paying attention to them, ignoring their needs or simply not showing any interest in them sexually and interlectually. What a load of hogwash. If you really want someone to pay attention to you, the onus is really on you to give them reason to.

Many women just don't make any effort to steam up their marriage. Let's get it straight. Men can do their part but are really limited by what they can do. They can lay out the candles, put on the music, take their spouses out for a romantic dinner but at the end of the day, the visual feast is what women create best - make-up, lingerie, sexy strut, etc. Try as they like to, I doubt many men will provide a visual feast in bed as much as a woman can.

But more to that, if there are signs of cracks in a marriage, or for that matter, in any relationship, steps have to be taken to address these problems. Another reason why I keep trying to say that communication is equally, if not, just as important as love is in a relationship.

If you can hit it off from the word 'Go' and comfortably talk about everything under the sun, then the odds are in yoru favour. If not, try to effect means to achieve better communication. Love alone is overrated. What it could use is a boost from a couple's open line of communication. That will help you over the long haul.

I also received an email saying how he thinks swinging will help save a marriage, since couple's won't have to do things behind their partner's back. Well, although I have from time to time spoken about it, mostly in favourable terms, I don't agree that it should be a solution for a marriage in crisis.

Swinging are for couples who are in healthy, strong and trusting relationships. It will enhance what they already have and has been known to strengten bonds. However, if such attributes are not present, swinging, I dare say, will be the perfect recipe for disaster. All it can do here is add further complication to an already tricky situation. Not advisable in my opinion.

Missus Singapore out!

Missus Singapore or Miss Us Singapore (at your own peril) - A married woman on the loose

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Blue Diamond Restaurant: Super Spiced Dum Biryani

Mutton Dum Biryani $6.50

I think there are essentially two schools of foodies when it comes to Nasi Biryani.  There are those who like a heavy Biryani where the spices hit you like a truck and there are others who like the rice to be light and aromatic and decide how much masala they want to eat with each spoonful.  I actually belong to the latter group as I like the light and airy texture of long grained Basmati rice and the natural fragrance which makes real Basmati rice special.

Of all the rice varietals that we commonly eat, only Basmati and Thai Jasmine Rice have that alluring fragrance which, incidentally, is a "freak of nature". Most rice do not have fragrance, but in the case of Basmati and Jasmine, there had been a mutation of a certain gene called BADH2 which causes the production of 2-acetyl-1-pyrroline, the aromatic compound that gives Jasmine rice, Basmatic rice and Pandan leaves its characteristic fragrance.  That explains why people like to cook  Chicken Rice with a knot of Pandan leaves in it to accentuate its fragrance. It also explains why Basmati can also be used for Nasi Lemak as its fragrance can also be accentuated by Pandan leaves and coconut milk.


Individual servings of Biryani in pots to keep warm

But most of us have been conditioned to eat Biryani where the fragrance essentially comes from the spices used in the masala principally because real Basmati rice is quite expensive.  So most shops will not use the top grade Bastmati rice but instead serve the rice with a robust masala.  That is not to say that it is necessarily bad, its just that you miss the essence of what makes Basmati so special.

Now, the Biryani at Blue Diamond is very good, but in the way that each grain of rice is coated with a very well balanced masala.  This shop is a favourite amongst our group of kakis.  The boss, Mr Farook told me that theirs is a real Dum Biryani where the rice and the meat are cooked together in a sealed pot.  He had learnt the recipe from various hotel chefs while he was working in the hotel line for 18 years prior to opening Blue Diamond.

My mutton biryani came with two generous pieces of tender lamb pieces which I have no complains about.  It was well spiced, tender and wasn't gamey.  My other kakis, however, commented that their pieces were more bones than meat.  The rice was coated with a masala which I thought was going to be quite heavy, but turned out to be fragrant and nicely spiced.  My kakis loved the Biryani here.  My personal preference is for the lighter version, but I still quite enjoyed the Biryani as the masala wasn't overly spicy.  4.25/5

Conclusion

If you are mad for masala, then this is the place for you.  The mutton is wonderfully tender and the masala well balanced.  The hard boiled egg sets it apart from the other Biryanis and actually goes quite well with the rest of the dish!

Blue Diamond Restaurant
24-26 Buffalo Road,
Singapore 219791
62911629
9.30am to 10pm daily

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GIVING LONGEVITY A MISS

Here is a cartoon from Linda from Penang, Malaysia. It was a timely contribution just in time for the weekend. I thought I'd share it with you. A good reminder why we need to keep looking good. Actually, the guy in the cartoon doesn't have much going for him too. She might be saying the exact same thing. Have a good one and remember to be safe if it gets down to the nasty.

Missus Singapore out!

Missus Singapore or Miss Us Singapore (at your own peril) - A married woman on the loose

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DIRTY DECEMBER (POLL 42)

The results are finally in from a poll I held recently on the month that people tend to have the most sex. As many of you would have guessed, December seems to be the most popular month.

I suppose people tend to party more, feel a little more relaxed or chill a little more - all ideal situations to land someone in the sack. But aside from that, June is the next most popular month for carnal activities. Perhaps, it's a mid-year reprieve from a hard half-year of work that compels many to have more sex.

Of course for us in Singapore, it's also the mid-year vacation when there is less stress from our school-going children which translates to more energy to expend for bedroom activities.

However, what I found interesting is that the third most popular month, by a mile, is September. Can anyone provide a possible explanation for this?

So here are the results for the Most Sex Month Poll:

January: 18
February: 19
March: 18
April 6
May: 12
June: 62 (17.6%)
July: 12
August: 20
September: 47 (13.4%)
October: 13
November: 30 (8.5%)
December: 94 (26.7%)

Total: 351

Missus Singapore out!

PS: Thank you all for taking part in my poll.

Missus Singapore or Miss Us Singapore (at your own peril) - A married woman on the loose

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A LADY'S LUST

Interesting really how times have changed when it comes to a woman's fantasy. In 1993, an article in a popular woman's magazine (I still have the cutting) indicated in a survey of 2,340 women between the ages of 25 and 55 fantasise about having a threesome. It was then, the most common fantasy cited.

In an article from the same title which carried out a similar poll in July 2011 - a total of 1,901 women were surveyed - a whopping 43% indicated that their most favoured fantasy was to be gangbanged! Interestingly, only 17% fantasised a threesome!

So it seems that it's high up on the list of fantasies. So the next time your partner has a smile on her face during her REM sleep period, chances are she dreaming she's in a room filled with a busload of studs. I don't have such fantasies. Goodness no!

Such thoughts are not in my list of fantasises at all. Perhaps that has to do with me already realising that. It has since a few years ago, been scratched off my list. These days, it's just part and parcel of my occasional indulgences.

Missus Singapore out!

Missus Singapore or Miss Us Singapore (at your own peril) - A married woman on the loose

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D'Bun: Juicy juicy Tua Pau!

I have been on a bit of a pau craze lately.  It all started with me trying to make the perfect pau skin at home.  I had tried it a few times before, but without much success.  Those of you who have tried it before at home might empathize with me.  My pau skin always comes out a bit yellowish and doesn't have that soft, billowy, cottony texture that our local pau possesses.  They are, in fact, more like the ones that Din Tai Feng makes which I never liked.

Our local Tua Bak Pau (large pork steamed buns) is one of those things that I really missed when I was living in Australia.  You can find excellent Hong Kong Char Siew Pau there, the type with the puffed up, "open flower" tops and over in the Vietnamese part of Sydney, you can buy a style of pau that is more like what we get here.  But somehow, they never really match up with our Tua Pau.  (That was quite a few years ago, so I am not sure if they have it now).


Drip Down Juicy!

The beauty of the Tua Pau is that wonderfully tender skin that is able to encase and contain the wonderful meat juices which you never get with the Hong Kong style pau.  And the Pau is at is juiciest when it is just freshly made and steamed.  But the problem nowadays is that a lot of Paus are made in a central kitchen, pre-steamed and then delivered to the outlets where they are steamed a second time to heat it up for serving.  So one of the secrets of getting the juiciest Pau is to know your Pau shop!



Over at D'bun, my friend Mimi, tells me that their Paus are made on site and they come out fresh at 10am every morning.  That means that if you go just after 10 am, eat your Pau straight out of the steamer, you will be rewarded with that explosion of Pau juices running down your fingers!  Of course, the Paus are still very juicy if you bring them home, but nothing beats eating a Pau when it is just steamed.

I have written about D'bun before a few years back.  But at that time, I focused on their Char Siew Sio Bak Pau.  Since then, Mimi tells me that they have made significant improvements to their Tua Pau.  One of the things that I am quite impressed with is the fact that they keep a mother dough (pre-fermented dough) which is needs to be "fed" every day.  In case you are not familiar with the mother dough, it is the more traditional way that breads are made.  Instead of using instant yeast which only needs a few hours of raising time, the mother dough is a starter dough that has been kept for a few days in order to mature and develop flavour.  Using a mother dough as opposed to instant yeast is always a good sign that the baker or in this case, the Pau maker is serious about making good Pau!


Ugly paus are often the best!

The other key to a great Pau is the thickness of the skin.  Here is where the Pau maker needs to strike that delicate balance between making the Pau look pretty while keeping the skin as thin as possible.  People nowadays like to buy Paus, keep them in the fridge and then reheat them when they want to eat it whereas in the past, people tend to just eat the Paus fresh at the kopitiam.  So modern Pau makers have to make Paus which are resilient enough to take multiple steaming without bursting.  Some Pau makers get around this problem just by simply making the skin thicker.

Most people like to buy Paus that look pretty, but at the same time they know that the best Paus are often the ugly ones.  You know the ones where the skin is so thin that the juices have soaked through such that when you peel of the paper at the bottom, you are left with a bottomless pau?  That bit of skin adhering to the paper is often the tastiest bit!

So what to do?  Pau makers like D'bun try to strike a good balance by making the skin as thin as possible why they will sometimes have Paus like the ones shown in the photo which they have to discard.  My solution?  Buy the pretty ones home and eat the ugly ones there at the shop!

Anyway, the Tua Pau here are excellent.  The meat is juicy and tender and the flavour is accented by the use of coriander.  Those that do not like coriander might find the fragrance a bit overpowering, but I personally feel that it helps to cut through the oils.  As I said, the best time to eat it is when it is fresh out of the steamer at around 10am where the juices simply burst out of the Pau! 4.5/5

Conclusion

The only places where you can get really nice and juicy paus are the boutique Pau stalls where the Paus are made on site.  Next time you buy Pau, try to get one of the ugly ones to eat on the spot, they often taste the best!

D'bun
358 Joo Chiat Road
Singapore 427603
6345-8220
8am-10pm daily

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SPANKY SPANKY

I have to be honest. The idea of being spanked was not high up on my lists of priorities in my earlier sexual adventures. For one thing, I was never particularly well-known for my high threshold for pain.

Of course as I grew older and pushed the boundaries of sexual pleasure, I gave it another go. While I could not say that I went gaga over it initially, I was not repulsed by the sensation. Thanks to learned and understanding 'instructors' I began to enjoy it more, especially over the last five or six years.

Over that time, I realised that I was going by it all wrong from the beginning. I was focusing on the actual spanking and not about the idea or deep-seated fantasys the sensation would bring out.

Pain, they say, can be pleasure; in a warped sort of way, I'll have to agree with it but erotic spanking when delivered right, can cause a delightful sting and warmth that slowly translates into pleasurable vibrations in and around the whole region.

Then, I realised from some 'experts' that it is not about how hard you hit but where you hit that matters. It is widely accepted that different people garner different levels of pleasures from the same type of spanking. What that simply means is that one ought to find the item - could be the hand, paddle, slapper, riding crop, bristle-whip or any other flogging toy - that produces the most satisfaction with an ideal or comfortable intensity.

From what I've gathered, the lower bottom, just above the upper thigh seems to be the most favoured area to be spanked. I concur. Both male and females seem to like the sensation that it creates.

More to that, there is also the psychological aspect of humiliation, which many of us subconsciously need in order to feel love. In a warped sense of logic, she may feel the need to be disciplined, 'cleansed' and perhaps even healed. That would go some distance in making her feel wanted. There is a strange need to be punished and this invariably can be a turn on for her.

For the men I spoke to, most seem to agree that being spanked by a woman does feed their desire to give himself wholly to her and be under the control of the woman he wants. Pretty intimate in this sense.

Of course in many ways, this act of spanking could also be part of a mere role-playing session i.e. straight-forward physical spanking without any emotional or psychological effect or purpose.That has pleasures on its own too.

For me, I personally tend to get more pleasure from a man feeling 'weakened' by my overly sexual overtures and finding the need to put me back into my 'good-girl' mold by giving me a good wholesome spanking. But that's just me.

I got this delightful slapper - with fur padding of course - from Edenfantasys which really hits on me the way I like. Of course if I feel a little more daring, I'd request for a harder smack with the other bare wood side.

There is such a wide choice of spanking and fetish items at Edenfantasys and looking at them, chances are, you will be eager to try them all. Just remember, the smaller (or thinner) the surface area of the spanking item, the greater the sting.

Missus Singapore out!


This post was sponsored by Edenfantasys.com

Missus Singapore or Miss Us Singapore (at your own peril) - A married woman on the loose

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HOTWIFE 101

I received a hotwife party invite the other day from an acquaintance. Apparently, there were three other women who were ready to get down and nasty with several other men. Yes, there is another side to Singapore in case you didn't know.

Well, the only thing was, it was not quite accurate. Obviously, they were not quite familiar with the term although some shallow imagination is all you really need.  Two of the women - I later learnt - were not married. Even though their boyfriends would be present, it was not technically what you might refer to as a 'hotwife' session. It was more like your run-of-the-mill swinging get-together.

For those not in the know, a hotwife is a married woman who has the freedom in her marriage to have sexual relationships with other men with her husband's consent. Sometimes he accompanies her and sometimes she meets these men alone. In both cases, he knows about it and consents to them.

Hope that clears things up. And in case you are wondering, no, I didn't attend that since I was tied up with another appointment.

Missus Singapore out!

Missus Singapore or Miss Us Singapore (at your own peril) - A married woman on the loose

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Liang Kee Teochew Restaurant: Teochew Chef behind the Wok!

Braised Duck $15

I always get excited about restaurants where the Chef also happens to be the owner of the restaurant.  I get even more excited when I find out that the Chef happen to be a 2nd generation owner who has been wokking for the last 30 years.  That usually means that the recipes have all been tried and tested by generations of satisfied customers and the wok has been honed thin by the relentless clanging of wok ladle.

Liang Kee has a rich history spanning all the way back to its days at the New Market (Xing Par Sat)  built along the Singapore river where Ellenborough market used to be before it was gutted by a fire in 1968. (Where Central now stands)  It was there that Mr Ng Bak Liang, a vegetable seller, decided to enter the restaurant business with no prior knowledge about the restaurant business.  Almost 40 years later, there are now three different restaurants which are called Liang Kee.  The history is a bit convoluted, but what essentially happened in a nutshell (cos I hate to write long stories) is this.  The original Liang Kee which was run by his third son Ng Siang Lin subsequently moved to Havelock road where a Taiwanese partner was involved.  The partnership split and Mr Ng then opened his restaurant at Robertson Quay.  But the Taiwanese partner remained behind and took over the restaurant at Havelock, renaming it G7 Liang Kee.  Mr Ng and his 5th brother Hong Seng ran Robertson Quay until the rental got a bit too expensive and they shifted to their current location at Whampoa three years ago.  Mr Ng Hong Seng then went on to opened another restaurant near to G7 Liang Kee in Havelock calling it Mu Liang Zai Liang Kee which literally means "Son of Mu Liang" Liang Kee.  So there you have it in one breath.  If, however, you are the type who like long stories, please check out the ST article here.

Cabbage Rice $12

Anyway, Liang Kee is a great place for that family meal and especially if you are looking for some classic Teochew dishes. The braised duck here is very good.  The meat is tender and the braising sauce is the classic thin Teochew type and very well balanced.  4.25/5.  Another traditional Teochew dish which you might not come across often is the Cabbage Rice.  This is the kind of dish that your grandma might have made for you at home.  Essentially, it is dried shrimps that have been braised with cabbage and mixed into rice.  Mr Ng tells me that they used to make this for their own consumption, but when a customer saw it and requested for it, they decided to add it on the menu. This is one of those nostalgic home dishes that you don't commonly find nowadays. 4/5


Sambal Crayfish $36

Although the stall started off selling Teochew food, they have since incorporated many of the our local flavours as well.  One of the dishes that really wowed us was his Sambal Crayfish.  This is one of those, "Really must eat more rice" dishes. The sambal was excellent.  It wasn't overly spicy and there was a nice balance of sweet and sour.  But it was the umami punch stemming from the generous use of dried shrimps that sealed it for me.  The crays were fresh and cooked just nice so that the meat wasn't tough and it combined so well with the sambal.  It's a dish that all our kakis said they would order again when they go back.  4.5/5

Threadfin Head with Bittergourd $33

Bittergourd is one of those cuisine conundrums which I am trying to figure out.  It is counter intuitive to want to eat something bitter because we are wired to avoid bitter foods since bitterness is usually a warning that the food might be poisonous.  However, bittergourd is far from poisonous and indeed has many medicinal properties, the most significant of which are its anti-cancer properties and ability to lower blood sugar.  But what I can't figure out is how our ancestors came to use it in cooking?  It certainly is an acquired taste and I would admit that as a kid, I hated it.  But as with a lot of these things, you begin to like it when you start eating it more frequently.  Nowadays, I eat it almost everyday as part of my five green juice regime.  I still hate the bitterness when I drink it in the mornings but when bittergourd is stir fried with fish head, the bitterness is balanced by salty, sweet and savoury flavours which make it pretty addictive!  4.25/5

Oyster Egg $12

It is amazing how well eggs and oysters go together.  Most oyster aficionados would frown upon a cooked oyster, but for me the aroma of freshly sauteed oyster has got that pheromonal property that fuels your gastronomic drive on a subconscious level.  The combination of oysters and fluffy fried eggs is almost as good as truffles and scrambled eggs.  The flavours combine so well that the only other component left is a bit of saltiness which is perfectly filled by a dash of fish sauce.  Phwa, shiok lah!  4/5

Orh Nee $12

I am a traditionalist when it comes to Orh Nee.  I don't know who started  omitting the pumpkin and adding coconut and sweetcorn instead, but it sure makes it rather easy to spot an authentic Orh Nee nowadays.  To me the gingko nuts and pumpkin are key ingredients to the classic Teochew dish and the presence of coconut milk is sacrilegious.  Of course, the other ingredient that no one uses nowadays is the pork lard which has been replaced by vegetable oil for health reasons.  What I would give to have a taste of the original Orh Nee!  I wonder if one can find it in Swatow?   Anyone knows?

The Orh Nee here is still pretty classic, but like most of the others, pork lard is no longer used.  Not spectacular but still satisfying for a Teochew Ah Hia like me.  4/5


Mr Ng Siang Lin (3rd Son)

Conclusion

Nice place for some down to earth Teochew and local dishes.  Liang Kee has been around for years and fans will be glad to know that they are still alive and well at their new location.

Liang Kee Teochew Restaurant
Blk 34, Whampoa West, #01-27
Singapore 330034
Tel 62977789
11.30am to 2pm, 6pm to 10pm
Open daily

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St Andrew’s Cathedral

I’ve re-shot the St Andrew’s Cathedral. Resolution, color and dynamic range has been improved over the one shot by a Nikon D70 so many years ago.

http://www.singaporevr.com/vrs/st_andrews_cathedral/

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VIDEO OF THE WEEK

Guys will be guys. But at the end of the day, we love them for what they are. At least they are not as complicated as how some of us gals can be. But that said, as we age, we get less complicated because we understand what needs to be done and what we need and don't waste time beating about the bush to get it. Have a great week ahead.

Missus Singapore out!

Missus Singapore or Miss Us Singapore (at your own peril) - A married woman on the loose

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FUNNY FRUIT

I love this strip. It's really sad that bananas are often ostracized in the world of fruits. After all they provide so many health benefits and are such a fun shape. It's perhaps the fruit with most character, and for some, function! Enjoy your Sunday.

Missus Singapore out!

Missus Singapore or Miss Us Singapore (at your own peril) - A married woman on the loose

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TOY THAT BITES

Well, there are just so many sex toys for men and women these days that it takes some effort to really choose a good and appropriate one, especially when you are buying it as a gift. I found this one that I am sure many wives and girlfriends will just love to give their partners.

Send them a note with it saying something like 'I hope you know what will happen if you stray! In case you don't, here's a reminder. Put it by your beside to remember me by.'

I remember this woman who wanted to join my SO and I for a threesome. She kept impressing upon us via email how she just loved sucking cock. Her words exactly. She was decent-looking enough but what we didn't catch on photo, we certainly did in person when we met up with her.

My SO cringed and would have nothing to do with her. Now, he is not affected by race, religion or skin-colour but this woman scared the hell out of him. And I must say too that I was kind of scared by her too, especially if she decided to go down on me. She had seriously protruding buck and vampire teeth. It would be a sight to behold in your modern-day vampire flicks but definitely not something you would like your privates to share a close proximity to, more so when she insists she loves to give oral sex.

This photo immediately got me thinking about her. 16 years later, we are friends but it may take another 16 decades before we might even consider having her in our bed with us.

Missus Singapore out!

Missus Singapore or Miss Us Singapore (at your own peril) - A married woman on the loose

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WE ARE ALL THE SAME

I hung out with some friends yesterday. It was a big group of around 15 and we had a wide mix of personalities, amongst other things. No I mean it was really as wide as you could stretch your imagination.

Besides my SO, myself, two girlfriends, four male friends - three brought their partners - there was a gay guy, lesbian couple and their transexual friend. Now how varied a bunch can you assemble.

It was somewhat of a reunion. We all knew each other from the 80s, except two of the girls who were girlfriends of our male friends. We had dinner at this ribs joint along Joo Chiat Road and ate like it was the last supper before the end of the world. We had a glorious time.

So this transexual friend of ours accompanied me to get a jug of margarita at the bar and when I walked to one end of the bar to look at their dessert menu, this American guy sitting at the bar begins to throw a few lewd comments at my friend. Credit to her, she ignored him. It was classic. She pretended like he wasn't even there, although you could smell his alcohol-riddled breath.

But we got talking after that and she revealed that it was no big deal since she had to deal with it all the time; in the coffee-shop, restaurant, club, market, on the street, and even at her workplace.

It just seems somehow that when a man sees a transexual, it automatically signals the licence to dish out a barrage of comments with a heavy sexual tone. It's like every transexual you see is a sexual animal waiting to show their prowess at pleasing males. Where did this come from?

Of course this is not in the majority but it reminds me very much of a time when women were coming out and starting to hold their own in society. To put them down, men would often throw sexual innuendo at them. Perhaps it's insecurity or downright ignorance but it's starting to happen again.

Trust me, I've met more heterosexual people who are more unbalanced. But it should not be about heterosexual, transexual, bisexual or homosexual really. We are all just people - different no doubt but still people. Without the variation and uniqueness, we will all just be robots in this harsh world. I doubt many of us want that.

The next time you see a transexual, just treat them like you would any other person. That is all they really want. No sexual innuendos and no suggestive implications. They are not always thinking sex. They want to lead normal lives too, something that you and I take for granted all the time!

Missus Singapore out!

Missus Singapore or Miss Us Singapore (at your own peril) - A married woman on the loose

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