ASK THE BOLDER WOMAN

Here is a question sent in by Amanda from Singapore. She seemed rather desperate in her email and it's not really a sex question but I just thought I'd offer my two cents worth. She is 24 and is about to get married to her boyfriend of five years.

Q: I am caught between telling and not telling him that I had a child when I was just 17 years old.The baby was adopted by a childless couple. My parents advised me not to tell him about it but I am not sure about it. What do you think?

MS: Well, honesty is really the best policy. At least more often than not. In this case, not telling, I feel, is a pure recipe for future contempt and betrayal. Even if he accepts it, he will always be wondering why you didn't tell him from the beginning.

I mean having a child is not something you can ultimately hide forever. It's bound to come out in the open and better he hear it from you than from someone else. You ought to come clean now and if he loves you for what you are now, whatever transpire in the past should not matter. If he doesn't accept it and wants to break up, hurt as you will be, it's better now that when you have a family which will inevitably bear the brunt of your discovered indiscretions.

My advice is to tell him. You parents probably mean well but they are not the ones who have to live with him for the long haul. You are. It's your life and your husband to be.

Missus Singapore out!

Missus Singapore or Miss Us Singapore (at your own peril) - A married woman on the loose

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