MAKE IT HAPPEN

There was a debate the other day between a girlfriend and myself about how sex works best in a relationship. She subscribes to the idea of having sex for the sake of sex. Don’t make an event of it of you will get you man expecting it all the time, which will eventually lead to exhaustion, she says.

Essentially, her idea of sex is to get it over with as soon as possible and spend time on other aspects of the relationship. She also feels that it just takes too much energy to ‘train’ her man to please her. Besides, she indicates that sex toys are there to do the trick. That, she feels is the recipe for a long-lasting and solid relationship.

I agreed with her that time should be spent on building other aspects of the relationship. However, I am not in agreement with her on how she ‘dispenses’ sex to her partner. I feel that sex is an important part in building bonds between couples, not the only one but definitely an important one.

Undoubtedly, bonds can be built with other activities, but replicating the level of intimacy that can be reached during sex – that is pretty difficult to do. I’m not saying that you have to let emotions run the show with each sexual encounter (I still enjoy my spontaneous quickies and mindless bonking) but just an occasional outlet of passion during sex can do wonders for the relationship.

In any case, both parties should be in the same groove and if not, they should make an effort to learn how to get their partners in the groove. Otherwise, don’t force it. A game of checkers under these circumstances would probably achieve more for your relationship.

While I also agree that sex toys are fun (especially when there is a range like what Edenfantasys offers), they should not always be played solo. In fact, by playing with your partner, it can certainly be quite arousing.

It’s all part and parcel of exploring alternative ways to reach an orgasm. At the same time, it can be a learning experience for your partner to see what it takes to please you. If not, hell, it’s still a show I’m sure he would be thrilled to watch. You just got to make it happen for both of you.

The jury is still out on who won the debate but just to note that I’m still deeply in love with my man after over 20 years of marriage, while she has just entered a relationship, her sixth in nine years, including a failed three-year marriage.

Missus Singapore out!


This post was sponsored by Edenfantasys.com.

Missus Singapore or Miss Us Singapore (at your own peril) - A married woman on the loose

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